To Be Free Or Not To Be
a play in one act, by Wikipedia. Odd, extra, superfluous lines added by WilliamB. Funded by Public Utilities.
Dramatis personæ:
WilliamB (WB)
Speakpidgeon (SP)
Prof
Togo
aupmanyav (aup)
fromderinside (FDI)
Jaybees
DBT
Speakpidgeon (SP)
Prof
Togo
aupmanyav (aup)
fromderinside (FDI)
Jaybees
DBT
Setting: a kitchen. The cast is at a table, with a view of the door to the basement, in a tenement building. City: New York, New Delhi, Sidney, Melbourne, Paris, London, Honolulu, Toronto, even Speederfundus, if you like.
WB (who has always been afraid of the dark): It's dark in here, will someone please turn on the light?
(basement door opens, and DBT speaks from the top stair)
DBT: You don't just 'turn on the light'. Simply hitting the switch does not take into account the intricacies and complexities of electricity. Electricity is the set of physical phenomena associated with the presence and flow of electric charge. Electricity gives a wide variety of well-known effects, such as lightning, static electricity, electromagnetic induction and the flow of electrical current. In addition, electricity permits the creation and reception of electromagnetic radiation such as radio waves. In electricity, charges produce electromagnetic fields which act on other charges. Electricity occurs due to several types of physics: electric charge: a property of some subatomic particles, which determines their electromagnetic interactions. Electrically charged matter is influenced by, and produces, electromagnetic fields. Electric current: a movement or flow of electrically charged particles, typically measured in amperes. Electric field (see electrostatics): an especially simple type of electromagnetic field produced by an electric charge even when it is not moving (i.e., there is no electric current). The electric field produces a force on other charges in its vicinity. Moving charges additionally produce a magnetic field. Electric potential: the capacity of an electric field to do work on an electric charge, typically measured in volts. Electromagnets: electrical currents generate magnetic fields, and changing magnetic fields generate electrical currents. In electrical engineering, electricity is used for: electric power where electric current is used to energise equipment; electronics which deals with electrical circuits that involve active electrical components such as vacuum tubes, transistors, diodes and integrated circuits, and associated passive interconnection technologies.
SP: Merde! Just go and turn on the light, WilliamB, it's only a few metres to your left.
Prof: I'm closer, I'll go turn on the light.
aup: Paropakaram punyaya, papaya parapeedanam.
FDI: (cheeky) And God said, let there be light, and behold, there was light...
Jaybees: It was bound to happen, in exactly this way. WilliamB could not have turned on the light.
WB: I felt certain that I could have.
Jaybees: Of course you did.
WB:mumblemumblewordswordslotsofwords.navelgazing. colonssemicolonsdashesandbrackets -
SP: The only thing that matters is that the light is on.
FDI: Another thing that matters is that I'm thirsty.
Togo: The sink is right over there. Tapwater in this part of the city isn't too bad.
WB: No litotes! The water is potable. Maybe bring me back a glass too, FDI?
FDI: (rising, going to a cupboard to get a glass, moving to the sink) Why can't you get your own water, WilliamB?
WB: Well, Jaybees said I couldn't have turned on the light, so I thought...
Jaybees: It doesn't follow. These are a different set of circumstances. If you want some water, just go and get some.
(Basement door opens, DBT speaks from the top stair)
DBT: No, one doesn't just 'go and get some' water. It's not that simple. It doesn't take into account the intricasies and complexities of water supply systems and plumbing. Water supply systems get water from a variety of locations, including groundwater (aquifers), surface water (lakes and rivers), conservation and the sea through desalination. The water is then, in most cases, purified, disinfected through chlorination and sometimes fluoridated. Treated water then either flows by gravity or is pumped to reservoirs, which can be elevated such as water towers or on the ground (for indicators related to the efficiency of drinking water distribution see non-revenue water). Once water is used, wastewater is typically discharged in a sewer system and treated in a sewage treatment plant before being discharged into a river, lake or the sea or reused for landscaping, irrigation or industrial use. But let's not forget about plumbing. Plumbing is the system of pipes, drains fittings, valves, valve assemblies, and devices installed in a building for the distribution of water for drinking, heating and washing, and the removal of waterborne wastes, and the skilled trade of working with pipes, tubing and plumbing fixtures in such systems. A plumber is someone who installs or repairs piping systems, plumbing fixtures and equipment such as water heaters and backflow preventers. The plumbing industry is a basic and substantial part of every developed economy due to the need for clean water, and sanitary collection and transport of wastes. The word "plumbing" comes from the Latin plumbum for lead, as pipes were once made from lead. Plumbing is usually distinguished from water supply and sewage systems, in that a plumbing system serves one building, while water and sewage systems serve a group of buildings.
aup: Vidyā.
SP: Oh mon dieu!
Curtain.
